Tuesday, October 30, 2012

TMI Tuesday - 10/30

The LONG and the SHORT of it

1. What is the longest relationship you have been in?
I've been married over 25 years.  To break that down, that's more than half my life and about 15 years too many.

2. What is the shortest relationship you have been in?
Even though I've been with L for a few years, it qualifies as my shortest relationship to date.

3. How often do you have sex? How often do you want sex?
L and I are fortunate to be able to see each other often.  We usually see each other (with opportunity for sex) at least once or twice per week (some weeks we see each other more often, but without opportunity).  Unless time is a huge constraint, we rarely have sex just once - most often it's multiple times with short breaks in between.  I think I speak for us both when I say that I wish it were more often, but I am also thankful for the time that we are able to spend together. How often do I want sex?  Put it this way...when we travel together, we normally have sex twice per day - morning and evening...and even then sometimes during the day I want to jump his bones.

4. How long does sex usually last?
That varies greatly...how horny are we?  Have we been drinking? Are we in a hurry?  Are we somewhere private or public? There are lots of factors.  Not only that, but I'm not in the habit of checking my watch while I'm being rogered.

5. Have you ever had an experience where someone couldn’t perform, finished too quickly or couldn’t keep up with you? Tell us about it?
That happens, but rarely....and quite frankly I don't see it as a big deal.  I choose to look at it positively - how can you be put out when someone's so excited to be with you that they've lost control?  I think if it were a regular occurance I might struggle more with it, however there are many ways to get someone off, so as long as he recognizes that he's left me hanging and helps looks after me after the fact, it's all good.

6. If you could only have one “type” of sexual encounter for the rest of your life, would you prefer
a) short and sweet
b) wham bam thank you ma’am
c) here for the long haul
d) slow and tender
Trying to decipher what these mean!  lol  Short and sweet - there's definitely times when a quickie hits the spot.  Does wham bam thank you ma'am mean rough sex?  If so, I'm in!  Here for the long haul - I assume this means a longer encounter.  Those are common if L's been drinking.  Slow and tender - there are times, though rare, when this is just what I need.  Overall, given my perceptions of what these mean, I'd go for the intense and rougher sex, so I'll say (b)!

Bonus: Would you consider ending an otherwise healthy and loving relationship if the sex wasn’t what you wanted?
In my first year with L, I probably had more sex than I did in my last 15 years of marriage.  In my experience, I think that without that sexual connection between two people and no other efforts made to meet needs, other feelings of intimacy fade and a relationship that you may have once considered loving can become something much more distant and irrelevant.  I do strongly feel though that it all depends on the people involved and the reason for the lack of sex.  I'm sure that it's possible for a couple to remain devoted to each other and do other things to maintain that intimacy between them - take the time to recognize the needs of the other, do things with and for each other and make an effort to support each other and be understanding about the reasons for the lack of sex - such a relationship might be able to endure.  So I think as much as I love sex, if the relationship was everything I wanted it to be, except for the sex, I might be inclined to stay. 


  1. I so agree with your bonus answer as I'm in that place and have decided there's no way I will ever sever. It's tough at times, since he doesn't throw me a lot of bones but I feel there's enough reasons to keep at it.

    ~Kazi xxx

  2. hehehe, love answer to #4, so true!!

    Happy TMI