TMI Tuesday - 7/31

The Comfort and Thrill of Sex

1. How do you feel about giving anal sex (penetration with penis, finger or sex toys)?
a. I love it.
b. I enjoy it.
c. I’m ok with it.
d. I don’t really enjoy it.
e. I don’t enjoy it at all.
f. I have never given anal sex.
g. I have never given anal sex, but would like to start.

When L fucks me, I like to fuck back - I like to be an active participant.  I had often wondered what it would feel like to be the man fucking the woman.  That was long before I knew one could have a strap-on penis and not only fuck a woman with it, but you could also peg a man with it!  Well, you can imagine my pleasure to get to try both of those options.  Not surprisingly, I loved it - you know, for those rare times when I want to be the boss man.  I've also played with L with fingers (just today, in fact) and sex toys, with equal enjoyment.

2. How do you feel about receiving anal sex (penetration with penis, finger or sex toys)?
a. I love it.
b. I enjoy it.
c. I’m ok with it.
d. I don’t enjoy it at all.
e. I have never received anal sex.
f. I have never received anal sex, but would like to start.

A less than stellar first experience nearly precluded me from trying again.  L took things very slowly and over the course of many months, built up both trust and tolerance until I decided I was ready to try with him.  As I've mentioned here before, I love it!

3. How do you feel about getting undressed in front of a new lover, for the first time, as he/she watches you?
a. It’s a turn on for me.
b. It turns me on a little bit.
c. I like it, but only because it gets him/her going.
d. It does nothing for me.
e. I don’t like doing it because I am shy.
f. I don’t like doing it because I think it’s immoral/improper.

For me, getting naked in front of a new lover is brutally difficult, so I'll say 'e'.  Not only am I horribly shy, but I'm also extremely self-conscious of my body.  I'm used to L now and with his constant support and encouragement, I have no issues at all with him...but it still doesn't do anything for me and I'm pretty sure it doesn't do anything for him either.

4. Do you express your sexual pleasure with moans, groans, sighs, and other noises (provided that you are actually turned on)?
a. Yes, each time I have sex (90-100% of the time).
b. Yes, on most occasions (70-89% of the time).
c. Yes, on some occasions (40-69% of the time).
d. Yes, on a few occasions (10-39% of the time).
e. Yes, but only on special occasions (1-9% of the time).
f. Never, not even when I am really turned on.

Interesting question.  I've never felt completely free and open with anyone prior to L.  I was always almost completely silent during sex and orgasm, but I was stifling myself to avoid comment.  Now sex is punctuated with moans, sighs and whispers and laughter...it's completely liberating and it's wonderful!  I'll say a!


5. Do you talk to your partner in a sexually explicit way?
a. Talking dirty is one of our favorite activities.
b. Occasionally, I like to talk dirty with my partner, and I do it with ease.
c. I talk dirty with my partner, but it feels awkward.
d. I would like to talk dirty with my partner, but I don’t dare for fear of being judged or ridiculed.
e. I would like to talk dirty with my partner, but she/he isn’t into it.
f. I don’t talk in such a way because I think it is inappropriate.
g. I don’t talk in such a way because I can’t bring myself to do it.
I'll say b.  When we're chatting, I'm more likely to "talk dirty".  I'm a pretty quiet person.  I'm far more chatty in writing than I am verbally and I often share my thoughts openly with L as we chat.  We communicate well verbally also, but he'll always get more out of me in writing.  I do sometime say naughty things when we're together and I do so with ease.

6. What kind of animal do you most sound like when building to a climax?
a. quiet little mouse
b. low moaning wolf
c. screeching beluga whale
You decide.  Here are links (His and Hers) to a previous story post where we included recordings.  Of these options, a fits best, I think.

Bonus: Which do you prefer comfort sex or thrill-seeking sex? Why?
I really think it has to be a combination of both.  I've made this observation with us over the years and though I've always categorized it as vanilla/non-vanilla sex, the explanations here fit what I mean fairly precisely.  If we haven't been together for a while, the sex is usually of the comfort seeking variety (vanilla, if you will)...reconnecting, re-establishing the familiarity, sating our hunger for each other. However, I've noticed that the times when we really push the boundaries and experiment and try new things, it's always when we've had the opportunity to spend a lot of time together...so maybe we're not as horny for each other (or are somewhat sated) and are in a mindset to look beyond the vanilla sex to try something more out of the ordinary.  

I think each certainly has its place, but it's hard to choose a favourite.  When we have a lot of comfort sex - and not to say the comfort sex is lacking in any way, because that's certainly not the case - then we miss the thrill seeking sex.  Similarly, I find it very difficult to dive into thrill-seeking sex if the comfort sex has been missing.  The intimacy and bond are critical for the thrill-seeking aspect.  I think for us, both are equally important for a well-rounded sex life.

Comfort seekers value deep intimacy, quiet engagement and trust over time of familiar relationships. For them sex is best as a safe, loving nurturing space.*
Thrill seekers value wild energy, adventure and novelty; they are willing to try open relationships, testing themselves outside average sexual practices. These folks crave a place to push the boundaries of new experiences.*
*Adapted from Susan Mernit’s blog

L's NPOTW - Cam session concluded

As promised, here is the other side of the cam session V and I had last week.

L's NPOTW

We haven't been having a lot of time together lately. I've been travelling a lot ...V has been under the weather (nothing serious)....and so not much time together for pictures and to have fun. So we decided to have a cam session and because we've been bad bloggers lately, we'll post the other point of view on Monday.

Feel free to join us with your own Naughty Picture of the Week - just link up in the comments!

TMI Tuesday - 7/24

Let’s Go To Bed

Tell us about your bed.


For several reasons I sleep in a rather unusual space. Quite some years ago, I had to move out of my shared bedroom situation. The space I sleep in is teeny tiny, not much larger than a bathroom.  I have no proper bed, but just a twin mattress over top of a layer of cubes similar to milk crates, the end ones turned sideways for storage.  My parents and siblings often express to me their anger that I live in that way in my own house, but really, it's not so awful. I've made it very comfortable and it's the cleanest and neatest place in the house. Some time ago I had the chance to move into one of the other bedrooms, but I decided not to. While the larger space would be welcome, the bedroom also came with some other pitfalls I wasn't (and am still not) willing to deal with.  So that being said, I decided that instead of not being able to really answer any of these questions this week, I'd describe what my bed will be like when I am finally in a position to be able to have my own bedroom and not have to worry about my safety or other concerns.

1. What size (King, queen, full, twin)?
Queen, I think.  Big enough to have space for a significant other, but yet cozy enough to allow for togetherness.

2. What mattress construction (conventional springs, air bed, water bed, Tempurpedic-type)?
I think a nice pillow-top mattress would be great.  Not too firm though...nor too soft,

3. What type furniture (just a frame, headboard/footboard, canopy, trundle, etc)? Describe.
I like traditional cherry wood furniture.  Likely it will have a headboard and a foot board.  Undecided between a four poster (with square posts, not round) or a sleigh bed - I like both.

4. If your bed has headboard/footboard or bedposts, have you ever been tied to them? Ever tied anyone to them? For what purpose? 
If I had a four poster, I'm pretty sure they'd be used for that purpose.

5. What kind of sheets (cotton, linen, silk, flannel)?
I love high thread count cotton sheets in the summer and flannel in the winter.  Both are very soft on my skin and allow for a lot of warmth.

6. What kind of blankets (cotton, wool, thermal, electric)?
I don't use blankets.

7. What’s on top (bedspread, duvet,…)?
A deliciously warm duvet.

8. What kind of pillow (down, foam, fiberfill)?
I have a great pillow that never gets flat.  It's foam, but some kind of special stuff in there.  I wake up, give it a little fluff and it's like it's brand new again.

Bonus:  Fill in the blank and answer question.

If _____ comes over, will you let them fuck you on your bed? Yes or no.

Well, if I ever get this bed, it will be because I got my own place....so I can fill in the blank with "L"....and say a resounding "Hell, yeah!!!"

TMI Tuesday - 7/17

DARING:

What are your 50 shades?

1. I enjoy the idea that my partner wants to inflict pain on me that:
a. makes me curious
b. is titillating and sexually arousing
c. that leaves me screaming and/or crying because that’s the way I like it
A. and B. are both true....when L announces that he's going to beat my ass for something, I do feel a bit curious about what exactly he has planned and also feel incredibly aroused by it.  The response is immediate.  I'm a person that has to get used to things....so when on the other hand I show up and L announces he's going to do something to (with) me that he hasn't previously even hinted at and I'm completely caught unaware, I feel the most delicious mixture of fear (of the unknown, not of L) and extreme excitement!

2. Do you like being forced to dress or act in a way that is humiliating? If yes, please describe. If no, why not?
I've never been in this position, so I'm not sure!

3. Do you like seeing bruises, scars, or marks that were caused during sex on either you or your partner? What kind of marks?
We try to avoid anything that would create a scar - the most minor scrape can leave a most horrendous scar on my skin.  I do love bruises, rope marks and bite marks inflicted by L. The very first time I was with L, he left a hickey on my neck which was unexpected - in fact I didn't know it was there. I was only lucky that the person that brought it to my attention was an ally.  L got carried away another time and left a number of bite marks on my upper back which were not hidden by t-shirts.  In both cases, it was a little tense and as a result he shies away from leaving marks on me, but I have to say, I love to see them and look at them in the mirror. I often beg him to bite me or leave his marks on me in the middle of very intense sex.  When he complies, it can put me right over the edge.

4. Would you like to be forced to do sexual things that you don’t necessarily like to do? Yes or No.
I think if you and your partner are open and communicate, you can easily compromise on these things.  If there's something I don't much care for that L loves or vice versa, I'm sure it could be worked out that everyone gets what they want at least some of the time.  As it happens, I've never been in this situation, but I think with proper discussion, "force" wouldn't come into it.

5. Do you want to be forced to watch your lover with someone else? Yes, No or It depends.
I think this is something that if I wasn't prepared for and good with, I wouldn't enjoy.  Again, with discussion anything is possible.  But I don't think I'd care to be forced to watch this.  I'm a wimp like that. :P

6. What dirty (sometimes inappropriate) things do you like to say to your sexual partner?
There isn't anything I really say on a regular basis to my partner that fits into this category.  I do say things in the throes of passion, but I have no idea what....though I've been known to whisper in his ear that I want to suck his cock.  Does that count?

Bonus: Finish this statement: I like being powerful in bed because  __________ .
Actually, I almost never like being powerful in bed...and if I'm in the mood for it, it's short-lived.  I spend my work day managing and leading people and making all manner of decisions, financial and otherwise.  I come home and run a household full of adults that do nothing - so I cook, clean, do laundry, keep appointments straight for everyone, pay bills, service the cars, drywall, paint, repair the toilet - you name it.  When I'm in the bedroom, I don't want to be powerful.  I want a generous lover that will allow me to look after his needs while looking after mine.  I want someone who understands that I need looking after too...that I'm not super woman and I have needs and sometimes need support too.  Oh my...that turned into a bit of a rant, didn't it?

TMI Tuesday - 7/10

Blankety Blank
Complete the sentences by filling in the blanks.

1. I could spend all day fucking but couldn't stand five minutes wearing mittens.  (Or socks...or a hat...he knows me well.)

2. I would love to have a robot in my house to do me because no one else (in my house) ever does.

3. The older you get the more horny you get.   ( I think it's the whore-moans)

4. I want to be naughty when I am with L.

5. My appetite for sucking cock can never be satisfied.

Bonus: If I were a hoarder, I would hoard matching bra and panty sets.  (Oh wait.....I already do that)


L was a real sweetie today and answered my questions for me (well, all but #2).  I read them out, then transcribed his responses.  Can't say that I agree with them all....and they seem to have a very particular theme.  He must be in a naughty mood.  Hope it holds over until tomorrow, when I'll see him.

L's NPOTW - Undercover Lover

L is once again travelling on business, so for two consecutive Fridays, last week and this week, I was tasked with doing the NPotW.  It turned out that I was so busy last week, I completely forgot to do it.  L promised me threatened me with a spanking if I forgot again this week....was very tempted to

Feel free to join us with your own Naughty Picture of the Week - just link up in the comments!

TMI Tuesday - 7/3

TMI Tuesday: July 3, 2012

Posted on July 1, 2012 

This week’s questions are republished from November 23, 2010.

1. Have you ever shared sleeping accommodations with someone of the opposite sex without anything steamy happening?
Yes...nightly...no action, steamy or otherwise! Some marriage bed!

2. Have you ever streaked, flashed, or otherwise partially or totally exposed yourself in public before (or after) an informal, unofficial gathering of people?
Yes I have. This is why I usually avoid drinking.   And that's all you need to know....  :P

3. Have you had dates with multiple people in the same weekend (or consecutive nights or the same night) while not all of your dates were aware of your actions?
Nope.

4. What is the most “romantic” you have ever gotten in a movie theater?
I haven't been to a movie theatre very often in my life and have, alas, never been "romantic" in one.

5. Have you ever had sex when you knew a non-participating adult was watching?
Yes. L's friend visited from England a while back. While the three of us did all have fun together, once she'd had enough, she went off to the side and assumed the role of official photographer and voyeur.  We wrote about it in a two part post, here and here.


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